


Echoes

by istanraven



Category: Gotham (TV)
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-05-18
Updated: 2019-05-18
Packaged: 2020-03-07 12:32:22
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,636
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18873283
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/istanraven/pseuds/istanraven
Summary: “How did you know I was looking for Jerome?” He asked, immediate confusion replacing her sense of unease. She pulled the phone away, looking back down at her brightened screen before her heart began to hammer in her chest, this couldn’t be right, she thought, she had to be going insane.The date was the same as yesterdays.Or, how Selina Kyle found herself reliving the same day, filled with regret and loss as she desperately tries to wake up from her reoccurring nightmare, the only thing stopping her was herself. (Based on Gotham's 4x16).





	Echoes

Ringing split the air as Selina bolted upright from her couch, her unruly curls flying in all directions as she looked around for the source of the sound. Her eyes immediately zoned in on the new addition to her artillery, a cell phone given to her by Bruce, lying on the table. He’d been insistent on her getting one for a while, telling her that if there was another emergency he could get to her quicker, although he continued to reiterate that if she wanted to still drop by that was a good option as well, but he felt better with her being easier to contact. 

She hated it.

Especially the fact that it woke her up.

After a moment the ringing stopped and she flopped back down on the couch, pulling the edge of the blanket over her head, curling up to fall back into her escape from reality. Before she could even get close the ringing started up again. Letting out an exasperated sigh, she ripped the blanket off of her before pulling herself off the couch and to the table. She lifted up the phone to see Bruce’s name on the front of the screen before she answered the call. 

“What.” She said, irritation evident in her voice.

“Selina?” 

“Bruce.” She deadpanned, trying to rub the sleep out her eyes. She looked up at the clock that hung above her table, surprised when she noticed it was about six pm. She wasn’t very shocked though, she had a long night at the Siren’s the day before. The lingering effects from the headache were still evident after Barbara had decided the volume on the music needed to be higher so more people would come by. 

“You owe me from yesterday. I need your help, meet me in the front of the GCPD in ten minutes.” 

Light tones sounded from the phone and she pulled it away from her ear to see ‘call ended’. She groaned putting the phone back on her table before running a hand through her hair. Selina knew she had to repay Bruce back one day for helping her with retrieving the jewelry she’d stolen so she might as well do it now with whatever escapade he was on now. She grabbed a hold of her boots and leather jacket, pulling them on before heading out the door and down the street to the GCPD. 

She immediately recognized him, leaning against the side of the building before she walked up to him. She watched as the corner of his mouth lifted slightly as he saw her come closer before his face went back to being emotionless. 

“Come on.” He said firmly before stepping inside with her walking in next to him. 

She faltered when she noticed then what they were doing, she’d expected them to sneak in through some entry way on the side for Bruce to steal something or save someone, but they walked right into the middle, facing multiple police officers sending her on edge. 

“You said you needed help but you didn’t say anything about walking straight into the GCPD.”

“You wanna bail out now?”

“No,” she said quickly, too quickly, “I just want to make sure there’s no jewelry debt.” 

“There’s no debt.” He said firmly, she would’ve passed it off as nothing but she heard the anger in his voice along with a slight falter in his words as if he were hurt. “I helped you to get the jewelry back because I wanted to help.”

“Nobody does anything just want to help.” She replied, she wasn’t sure if she was trying to persuade Bruce of that or herself. 

“Fine,” He said, looking back over at her, “Once this is over, there will be nothing left to settle between us, can you do it?” 

Nothing left to settle, she thought, that meant no reason for her to see him. He’d move on after this, not need her anymore. That was basically what he was trying to say, she was sure of it. She knew this day would come though, eventually he’d get tired of her, push her to the side while he went on to live his successful, wealthy life. Then again, she knew part of her was forcing this onto him, she’d been forcing it onto him for years. 

She was essentially making it almost impossible for him to want to keep her around. Every Time she’d let her guard down or she felt something, felt feelings, she had to pull away, becoming emotionally invested in anything continued to destroy her over and over again. Maybe this was a good thing, maybe with him out her life she could be alone, that was the best for both of them. She could live alone knowing she couldn’t hurt anyone and no one could hurt her. 

She looked back up at him, he was still waiting for her answer. She just needed to help him now, get this over with so she could return back to her apartment and sleep. She went to stand in front of the commissioner's office door before facing Bruce again, her hands working behind her back to unlock the lock. She felt the lock suddenly click into place before she turned the handle of the door slightly. 

“Okay, got it. Which file?” She asked.

“Jerome Valeska. There’ll be an red Arkham stamp on it.” He said before quickly sweeping his eyes over the police station for probably the tenth time. 

“Valeska? What do you want with that nut?”

“He broke out of Arkham tonight.”

“Yeah, what does that have to do with you?” She asked, worry creeping into her words. Bruce didn’t have to tell her what he was going to do for her to know. He was going to go after him for whatever reason he thought was right. He was going to get himself killed. 

“Can you just get the file before someone sees us?” He said sharply, staring at her. She paused for a moment, her eyes scanning his face. She could tell he was trying to seem closed off, professional about their situation. She let out a lighthearted laugh devoid of humor before she pulled herself into the office, quietly closing the door behind her. A few moments into her thumbing through of the files she heard the insistent knock on the window before she turned around to send Bruce a glare. 

“Bruce Wayne? What are you doing here?”

She heard the distant sound of one of the officers before she dropped down, hidden behind the desk. 

“Detective Harper.” She heard Bruce say loudly. She looked out from the side of the desk, watching as Bruce walked forward, turning the woman away from the view of her room. “Where is Captain Gordon? I need to see him.”

She zoned out their conversation while she quickly started looking through the files, feeling a spark of triumph when she found Valeska’s. She made her way to the doors before motioning to Bruce the file in her hand. His eyes flitted to hers before looking back at the woman. 

She could see the gears turning before his eyes brightened like he’d gotten an idea. Before she could even process what had happened she watched as Bruce started to breakdown in front of the police officer, his face quickly switching to one of mock pain before she heard his cries. 

“I’m sorry, I just- “ He choked out before turning his back to her, bringing his hand to his face. “I know Valeska wants me dead, I just know it.”

“Easy Wayne, you can just stay here, you’ll be perfectly safe.” The officer said, her back still turned to her.

She heard the muffled cries from Bruce before a small, “okay.” 

Selina found herself fighting so hard to keep the smile from making its way onto her face. Bruce was a lot of things, but an actor? She was surprised the lady was buying it. She quickly opened the door before walking out down the stairs and to the front of the GCPD. 

A few seconds later he met her out front, she had an eyebrow raised a smirk resting on her lips as she looked at the boy standing in front of her, his eyebrows drawn together as if he were trying to look serious. 

“That was some crap you pulled back there.” 

“Well some of us aren’t used to lying to get ourselves out of situations.” He replied quickly, immediate irritation shot through her as she looked up at him. 

“Excuse me?” She voiced, raising her eyebrows slightly. 

His face completely switched from one of placidness to regret and for a moment it looked as if he were going to reach for her. “Wait, I didn’t-” He quickly froze, his blank expression returning to his face before he started walking back towards his car parked on the side of the road. “Come on.” 

Normally she took orders from no one, especially Bruce. Instead she let out a breath before following him to his car. She knew breaking into Gordon’s office and stealing a file was enough to pay him back, she knew she could walk away and stop everything between them, to stop the ever growing pull towards each other. She could break the connection between them that had been growing stronger since the day they had met in the hallway of Wayne Manor, when she’d shaken his small hand. She could destroy the feelings that have taken over her entity, filling her every thought and sense. They made her weak, they made her run after this boy countless times and times again, straight into the face of danger. 

What terrified her is that she would keep doing it without a second thought and she knew he would do the same. 

They would be each other’s destruction. 

A part of her desperately wanted to grasp onto the little time they had left because she knew as soon as one of them walked away tonight, it was over. 

They both knew that. 

Maybe that’s why Bruce looked back to make sure she was following him, maybe that’s why she continued to. 

She pushed her thoughts away and she pulled herself into the passenger’s side of Bruce’s car as he quickly started leafing through the papers in the file. She watched as his eyes scanned every part of the pages, his brows creased in concentration. 

“Do you know this diner, Zach’s?” He suddenly questioned.

“No,” she said, shaking her head slightly, “why?”

“Look, Valeska’s uncle owns it.” He said, quickly looking up at her before looking back at the file. “He might know where Jerome would go after escaping.”

“Still sounds like a cop’s job to me.” 

“I could have killed Jerome after he kidnapped me, and I didn’t.” He said firmly, looking up at her. ”Any harm he does now, I share a part of it. In a way I’m responsible for his life now.” She knew he would do this, think this was his fault, something he had to take care of alone just like with his parents murder. He hadn’t been strong enough to pull the trigger then, how did he expect to be strong enough to do it now if Jerome had a gun at his head. 

“I can’t just wait to see what the cops will do, I have to get him back to Arkham” He continued, his gaze fixed firmly on her. She was silent now, just watching him wondering how she’d gotten in this situation and how she was going to get him out of it. 

“What?” He asked for a moment, confusion written across his face. 

“Your ego Bruce, it’s huge.” She quickly replied, trying to set the harsh truth to him. She knew she was pushing it far, but maybe opening his eyes up to what he was really doing would stop him. 

“What?” 

“Not everything is your fault or your responsibility, get over yourself. It’ll make you a little easier to be around.” She said, shuffling a little in her seat as she turned her head, trying to avoid his eyes. She should stop this, she should stop hurting him like this. But she knew a part of her was fighting to push him away, to make him angry and hurt so he’d forget about her and let her go. But another part of her wanted to desperately reach over and press her lips against his for one last time, tell him how much she needed him because he was all she had. 

But she couldn’t. 

She watched as he flinched slightly, the hurt flashing across his face for a moment as his gaze never left hers. It was as if something clicked inside of him, she could see the overbearing sadness in his eyes before he started leaning closer to her. She froze, her heart beginning to beat rapidly, she swore he could hear it in the small expanse of space in the car. Right as she could feel his breath slightly on her cheek she heard the sound of the door open and the rush of cool air from outside as he pulled away, resting back in his seat. She swore for a moment she could see the quick flutter of his lashes as if he were trying to compose herself like she was. 

“Thanks for the advice.” He said. 

Anger quickly overtook her senses as she let out a small laugh devoid of any humor before she pushed the door open further, stepping out of the car. She didn’t want to do this, she didn’t want to walk away, she wanted him to tell her to get back in the car. She knew it was going to end, but she wasn’t ready now, it was too soon. She held onto the door for a moment, watching him, a small glimmer of hope remained in her.

“You sure you don’t need my help anymore?” She asked, “We’re even?”

“You don’t owe me anything, Selina.”He murmured, “You never did.” 

She closed the car door then, letting her smiling facade drop as he drove away, the distance between them growing rapidly. She turned around, walking in the opposite direction, desperate to increase the space between them. This had to happen at one point, she’d just wished their parting had been different, then again their goodbyes usually always ended with harsh words and broken hearts. 

She knew that all to well.

She continued down the street, her footsteps sounding into the alley’s nearby. She truly felt alone in that moment. Sure she had been alone her entire life, but that had changed when she’d met him, when she knew he’d always be there if she needed him. She knew she could rely on him because Bruce wasn’t one of those people who could move on so easily, when he cared about someone he cared with every fiber of his being, he cared so wholeheartedly it scared her. Maybe that’s why he had been so quick to push her out of the car, maybe he didn’t care anymore, he'd moved on as should she. He didn't need her anymore anyways, their adventures together had been in the past, he was strong enough to fight his own battles without needing to call her and she had to accept that. 

That’s what she kept telling herself as she walked further and further away from him, further away from the one person she gave a damn about in this city, the one person who was probably going to get himself killed taking responsibility for things that weren’t his to take responsibility for. She froze on the street, looking down into the small puddle at her feet, watching the curly haired girl looking back at her. She saw the tears now, running down her face, she hadn’t even noticed. She suddenly stomped down onto the reflection before doing something she knew went against everything she had been reiterating in her mind for the past few hours. 

She wasn’t going to walk away just to find out he’d lost his life in that diner trying to be a hero. 

She was going to help, and this would be the last time.

She deserved to laugh at herself, how many times had she told herself that the moment shared between them was the last. How many times was she going to keep telling herself that before she climbed back in through his window a week later? She quickly grabbed a hold of a woman on her sprint down the street before asking her where Zach’s diner was. The woman, wide eyed, gave her directions before Selina gave her a quick thanks and made her way down the adjoining alley. 

Her heart had begun to hammer in her chest, her mind procuring images in her head of the possibly situations Bruce was in. But this was Bruce, he’d gotten out of problems Selina thought would have been impossible, he was one of the strongest people she knew, but stronger than the sicko with the gun? Stronger than the sicko that had gotten a long time in Arkham to mess him up even more than he already was? Right as she turned the corner, she immediately spotted the large sign sitting on the top of the small building, Zach’s, it read. She silently sprinted the short distance to the side of the building before squatting down, grabbing onto the cement on the side as she barely lifted her head up to look inside. She immediately spotted Bruce being detained by a man, Jerome standing nearby, a gun hung in his hand as she saw his mouth open widely in silent laughter. She crawled back out so she wouldn’t be in view before she went around back, making her way inside. She immediately heard Jerome’s laughs splitting the air. 

“I uh-” Jerome said between laughs, “I can watch this all day, Bruce.”

She pulled herself out behind the counter silently, before quickly striking her whip, ripping the gun from Jerome’s hand. He quickly turned to look at her, confusion written across his face, his head tilting slightly. Her gaze quickly turned to Bruce before she reached to grab a hold of the gun laying at her feet. 

“Hands off big boy.”

The man let his hold on Bruce falter for a moment as his eyes trailed to the gun she held. Bruce took this as an opportunity to take a hold of the stick he’d originally had been held against before knocking out the man. 

“Still don’t need my help, Bruce?” She questioned.

“Selina.” He let out, a look on his face that involuntarily made her smile. He looked relieved, like she was. Maybe he’d also thought he’d never see her again after leaving in that car. Maybe both of them didn’t want to say goodbye, didn’t want this to be the end.

But both didn’t know how to stop the inevitable. 

“Selina, huh?” She heard Jerome ask, pulling her out of Bruce’s gaze. “Well, isn’t that a nice name?”

She lifted up the gun, aiming it right at him. She wanted this to be over, she wanted to do what needed to be done because no one else was. 

“Selina.” She heard Bruce warn. He’d just said her name but she heard the cautions behind it, he didn’t want her to do this, he wanted to take care of this just like he always felt the need to take care of anything. She wanted to do something for him for a change, take away some of the pain in his life because god knows how much he’s already had. 

She watched as Jerome quickly silenced Bruce before turning back towards her, a sickening smile making its way onto his face. “She’s not that kind of girl.”

“Wrong answer, freak.” She said, before he spoke again, lifting a finger, “oh that’s funny, cuz-” then she saw a flash of movement, when Jerome ran to hide behind the counter next to the door, dodging the bullets she fired straight at him, adrenaline pulsing through her veins. 

Before she even realized what was going on, Bruce had grabbed onto the gun in her hand, pointing up towards the ceiling before it fired another shot. In their squirmish, Selina’s leg suddenly buckled under her, throwing both of them to the ground, the breath knocked out of her as her body hit the diner floor with Bruce hovering over her. Their heavy breaths echoing across the walls of the diner as they began to realize the position they were in. Her heart stopped for a moment when she noticed his face come closer to hers, before he froze, looking down at her with dark eyes that felt as if they were piercing through her very soul. The light streaming in through the windows made him look as if he were glowing and Selina swore in that moment that she would never find another man more beautiful in her entire life. He literally looked as if he were an ethereal being, well at least he was close to one. The boy never ceased to always want to do the right thing, to help people, to help her. 

She couldn’t help but let her gaze flicker to his lips for a moment before looking back up at him. Somewhere during their time on the ground, Jerome had escaped signaled by the ding from the bell on the door. But Selina made no move to get up, and neither did Bruce. She truly thought about what would happen if she moved the hand gripping onto his arm to his neck and pull him down to brush her lips against his. Thoughts from earlier started flooding her mind. She’d gone back to help him and this was it, this was over..

“You should've let me shoot him.” She said, before shoving him up. “This would’ve been over by now.”

She stood up now, brushing her curly hair out of her face before standing in front of him again. 

“Selina, I told you I was responsible for him. I can’t just let him be shot, Selina, I can’t.” He said fervently, stepping closer to her. 

She recognized the conviction in his voice, the utter determination. He was going to complete this task whether it took his life or not, and that’s what completely terrified her. He would stop at nothing till what he had to do was done. 

“Well then I’m not taking responsibility for this mess. So let’s get out of here before the cops show up.” She said, turning around, carrying her last bit of hope towards the diner door. “Yeah?” She looked back at him, but she knew that look on his face and her heart dropped. He wasn’t leaving, but she was, and it was going to break both of them. “Come on.” She said, her last desperate plea being voiced. 

Please just come with me, she wanted to say. She wanted to tell him that she wasn’t strong enough for this, that eventually she knew she’d have to let him go to protect both of them, but she didn’t want it to be now. Not when they needed each other the most. 

“It’s not over yet.” She heard him say, she quickly looked up at him now, watching his gaze soften, his brows still creased as emotion flashed across his face. She’d caught the double meaning, but she’d made her decision that morning. She made her decision that moment she turned around on that street. 

She had to let him go. 

“Suit yourself.”She said, “Just,” she paused for a moment, emotion suddenly taking over before she spoke again, “don’t take so much responsibility that you get yourself killed.”

She took one more glance at Bruce, watching him blink rapidly for a moment as if he were trying to keep his emotions at bay like she was. She took a breath before walking out of that diner, the ringing from the bells announcing her absence in the small space, signaling the absence of Bruce in her life. It took everything in her not to turn around, not to see the boy standing in the middle of that dingy diner, his dark eyes following her retreating figure into the dark streets of Gotham.

That night as she layed on her couch, the small blanket over her, one of her cats softly purring on her stomach, she thought about what came next. She thought about what it really meant not to have Bruce Wayne in her life. She’d survived just fine before she’d met him, when all she had was Ivy. But she had gotten so used to him being so close, for her to be able to climb in through his window with his horrible security system. She’d grown to depend on him, to look for him for help or important things going on in her life. Now that their deal was done, now that they didn’t owe each other anything, neither would have the need to see each other again. She wouldn’t have the excuse to come to his house telling him she needed help when she really wanted to see him. 

But she would never tell him this, she would never call him up asking if she could see him because she missed him. He had to move on with his life, not worry about the street trash, but the billionaires and the criminals he decided to associate with and deal with. 

They had to grow up, they were children anymore, they couldn't just see each other all the time and it not mean anything. They both would be lying to themselves if just seeing each other was simply a small occurrence. With added emphasis, everything had just suddenly started to mean something more. 

She didn’t know when sleep had overtaken over, casting her into the shadows of the dark, but she grimaced as she heard the loud rings from her phone, again. She groaned before pulling the sheets above her head again, but suddenly froze. The only person who knew this number was Bruce. 

Bruce was calling. 

She quickly threw the blanket off of her before grabbing the phone and hitting answer with shaky hands. Maybe last night wasn’t the end, maybe he couldn’t let her go like she couldn’t let him go.

“Bruce.” She murmured, hope surging through her.

“Selina.” She heard his voice reply.

“Are you okay, did you find Jerome?” She quickly asked, hoping he hadn’t gotten himself in even more trouble and that’s why he was calling her. 

There was silence on his end for a moment and a feeling of unease started to envelop her. 

“How did you know I was looking for Jerome?” He asked, immediate confusion replacing her sense of unease. 

“What?” She asked slowly. 

“Look, you owe me from yesterday with the jewelry. I need your help, meet me in the front of the GCPD in ten minutes.” 

The sound of the line ending was signalled by the small tones sounded from the phone as she pulled it away from her ear. What the hell, she thought, of course she would know about him looking for Jerome, she had been with him. And why would he give her the exact same instructions from the day before. That’s when she began to notice things, she specifically remembered going to sleep with her leather jacket and boots on, too tired and exhausted to even take them off. But she wasn’t wearing them. 

She looked back at her phone, turning it on before her heart began to hammer in her chest, this couldn’t be right, she thought, she had to be going insane. 

The date was the same as yesterdays.


End file.
